Wow.. It really has been awhile since I wrote on this. Not quite sure why.. not enough emotion, time, there's plenty of excuses! My thought today is about communication, and why no matter how hard we try, and how bluntly, sometimes a message is just not received. It may be understood, comprehended, but ultimately ignored. It's as though whilst the brain understand transferring that into life is just too much to ask! God asks us to continually learn and grow in Him. He asks this of all of us so we must all be capable, IQ level is not an excuse. But still we ignore this request, among many others that He asks of us. I just don't get it! Is this something I too am guilty of? I am going to assume so but I can't think of any examples right now...  All I know is God really did make man and woman differet despite everything poststructuralism feeds you brain. 
On another note we have almost been married a year! 5 more days... It's been amazing... a journey of growth, love, joy, pain, every emotion imaginable. whilst sometimes i have felt as though it would take less nagging to get a brick wall to communicate the sweat and tears is all part of the journey, and the ways in which we have both grown are amazing. I wouldn't change anything - not even the fights I lost. 
I miss you Eli - things just aren't the same without you to fall back on at times, but in alot of ways it has been good for me to grow and deal on my own and with Chris. But you are still and irreplaceable part of my life and I love you. 
My brother - ha well you and Elsa have almost been married a year too! And in that time whilst I haven't received a phone call or an email from your end I still love you and miss you. I know it is hard being miles away but sometimes I really wish that it wasnt a family trait to ignore the things that hurt. Sometimes I think it is easier to ignore everything but it isnt. I miss you and whilst communication reminds me of that i'm willing to go through the pain because I love you both. No matter what side of this earth ou spend your life I'll still be your sister so as annoying as I m please don't take that for granted. I'll only be your physical sister once. 
Man, over the past 4 years my life has really changed and Lord I am forever grateful of what ou have given me. Please don't allow me to take it for granted. I want to spend each day worshipping at your feet through the life that I lead, honoring ou with every step and breath I take. Please help me to do that. I miss my Peninsula family. I miss singing all night long. I know I will always have that Lord and that this is shallow, but I miss the physicalness of it all that gave me spiritual strength and encouragement. 
Well I hopefully tart a teaching degree next year, I aced my assessments so my marks are well and truely good enough. Thankyou Lord for this journey and pelase lead me in it. Hopefully I will update this more often now. Its always a hope but mabe this time a reality. We will see... | 
